Every year, around now, people make New Year's Resolutions... Or they revel in moral superiority because they don't.
Either way, change doesn't happen.
So why not? Why is change so hard? Lots of reasons, but there's one big, sneaky reason that I bet you haven't thought of... Your goal isn't really your goal.
What?
When you search out the latest tool, trick, gadget, or method to achieve your goal and still miss it, chances are you actually DID achieve something but not what you were going for. Listen and find out what I mean, and give yourself an instant boost in your chance of success.
I've been fortunate to work with many people, particularly former athletes and warriors who've been able to break free of their comfortable misery, being stuck in the doldrums of a ho-hum life, and find their spark again. There's been one quality that's really stood out among those who've been successful in their transformations and those who haven't. It's the quality that helps them face through adversity, find their grit, and keep going when they want to quit or get distracted by something else. Listen as I get into what it is, how to find it, and what to do when it changes!
I have so many conversations with people who start plans with the best of intentions. They follow the plan, they do well, and then something happens. They fall off. Something derails them. Eventually they find another plan or guru and repeat the process. Why does this happen? In the moment, it can be a lot of things. However, at its core... it's all about self-leadership. Here's why.
We know that for longterm change, behaviors have to change. What does that mean, though? What if there was a formula to break that process down into parts, pinpoint exactly where it might need some help, and even to help troubleshoot it if things aren't going as well as you hoped? There is, and I get into it here.
It seems that so many of us forget that, when it comes to goals, setting them is only the first step. You've got to achieve them next! Of course, that can be a lot harder. It's not just because goals are hard. There's some real brain principles involved here that often stand in your way. Here's three quick tips that I use with my clients, including a couple you don't hear talked about much, to short-circuit those brain roadblocks and get you actually achieving what you set out to do.
Let's cut the crap. The Internet is full of BS fitness, nutrition, and mindset tips. Many of them are fine, but they really aren't what you can apply to your daily life. Here are three tips for each that I use almost every day with my REAL clients, who are real people with real families, jobs, lives, and who still want to be the BEST.
What to do when you are behind in a goal? I was on a long ruck this weekend and thinking about what to do if I ended up being behind in my goal. If you're like me, then your tendency is to start to rush, skip steps, and often end up failing because of it. Instead, here is a simple system you can use to stay out of the mental and emotional trap of getting behind and becoming worse off.
Let's be real: There's a whole lot of us who are used to having a full gym and all the toys to play with but are currently stuck with limited equipment at home or in a communal garage. So how do you increase the challenge when you can't just go to heavier weights? I got you. In this podcast I go over three of my favorite strategies that I use with my remote clients to help them get stronger, faster, and in better shape... even if they are limited with equipment.
We've all seen the cartoon of the man riding the donkey with a carrot held out in front of it to entice it forward. We've also all seen someone pushing a donkey or horse to action with at stick. When it comes to both finding a purpose AND getting there, it's important to have the carrot, the stick, AND the donkey.
What is the NUMBER ONE quality you can develop for success - be it fitness, nutrition, business, relationships, or whatever? In this podcast I'm going to dig into the "keystone" quality that goes BEYOND "Discipline Equals Freedom" (all respect to Jocko) and what you really need to cultivate for success when you're on your own two feet.
Living a friction-free life? Is it possible? I don't know. The idea of it is a concept that I teach my clients to help us find and eliminate "friction points" that KEEP us from the flow, ease, and focus of living our fittest, strongest, healthiest, and best lives.
How do you keep from staring at the abyss between you and a new, big goal and quitting... when your brain is DESIGNED to do just that? By future-pacing. This isn't daydreaming, though. There's more to it than that. Here's a "Movie-style" trick to keep you on target, teach your brain to focus on what WILL work versus what won't, and to help you overcome that freeze response.
What are the three states that you'll often go through before you hit success? Remember that your body views all stress as a form of threat. Then remember that your body handles threat in three ways: Flight Freeze Fight We want to get to "Fight" as fast as possible, because it's the only way you're going to win. But the other two options are really tempting, and your body has distinct mindset challenges that get in the way. Why do you sandbag? Why do some situations make you (or others) super angry, when there's been no real affront? What about the "Choke Artist"? Why do those people choke under pressure? Because they are stuck in one of these three mindsets. Here's how to recognize them and break through so you can put your energy into succeeding.